I'm So Sad

[Strange333]

Hi Everyone,

My poor little baby cat, Rolo died. It was cancer. It was so fast, I didn't even see it coming. Two days ago, he was fine. Now, he is dead.

My cats are like my kids. I didn't know I could be so heartbroken.

He was only 3 years old! He always had checkups every six months! How could this have happened? Did I miss something? Did I kill my baby because I didn't see it?

I'm going to miss him more than I can ever explain. He was so young. I'm sorry for going on like this, but I just had to let it out somewhere.

Thanks for Listening,

Nich

P.S. I'm going to upload some photos. Sort of a Rolo memorial.

[jesgooch]

So sorry to hear about your kitty.

:(

[Jeff California]

Sorry to hear about the kitty! As a cat person (I have 3), I know how hard it can be to lose one..

Jeff

[Passenger Mark]

I'm a pet person myself! It is hard.

I am sure there is nothing that you did to cause it. Don't beat yourself up like that.

So sorry to hear the news.

[Debbielevis2]

Nich

Pets are a huge part of a family, so of course, it's normal for you to feel so very sad.

I think a lot of us "in here" are pet people. Frequently, someone will make a comment about their pet.

I've had Herekitty (he was abused as a kitten) for just over a year now, and I just love him.

There are no comforting words for you - just know that I'm so sorry.

Debbie

[LesliePHX]

Nich, I'm so sorry. It is very hard to lose a kitty so young. You can't blame yourself, there was nothing you could have done. Your love for him comes through in your post, I know you gave Rolo a good, good life.

I'm very sorry.

Leslie

[Chelle]

Nich, I'm sorry for your loss :(

I love my pets like they're my kids, too. It's very hard when you have to say goodbye to one, my heart is heavy for you.

I hope that he is in a better place.. no longer suffering.

I will say a little prayer for the newest angel in feline heaven....

:hug

[xiknal]

It can be devastating. Our littlest family members are so precious, and it really hurts when they pass on...especially when it is sudden and unexpected.

You may already be seeking help in this way, but here's one of a number of online pet-loss resources:

www.lightning-strike.com/resources.htm (http://www.lightning-strike.com/resources.htm)

This page has some good links to poetry, memorials, discussion forums, and info about what we go through (including self-blame) when a beloved pet dies. I have experienced the same feelings you are having, wondering whether there might have been something I could have done to change the outcome and wallowing in the "if-onlys". This happens often.

Here is another excellent site, and it also offers a telephone hotline staffed by volunteer pet loss counselors. They can really help.

web.vet.cornell.edu/public/petloss/ (http://web.vet.cornell.edu/public/petloss/)

Somewhere there is a poem or an essay--I forget which--that applauds those of us who take in these precious little beings knowing that their lives are more transient and fragile than our own. Animal lovers are good-hearted, big-hearted people.

You might know that I rescue cats from kill shelters. It was the sudden loss of two of my dear cats four years ago (ages 15 and 12) within a few months that motivated me into rescue. I didn't expect to get so deep in over my head (it seems, with 33 cats), but the need is infinite.

Perhaps, when you have taken the necessary time to grieve and to cherish your memories of Rolo, you might consider going to a kill shelter and saving another kitty in his honor. That's what I did for Quilla and Ziggy, and it really helped me.

You may have had adequate opportunity to talk over what happened to Rolo with your vet, but if not, you can PM me if you like. I have had to learn a lot about feline medicine and can give you some good links on the latest research into whatever he had--if that kind of info seems helpful to you. I am a data sponge, so I have found it helpful.

Whether or not you believe in the Rainbow Bridge, it can be comforting to read the story; you'll find it easily.

Please be gentle with yourself. :hug You did everything right and nothing wrong.

Barb

[WillFlyToDisney2]

Hugs, Nich!

Kelley

[YankssRule]

I'm so sorry to hear that Nich.

:hug


Janet

[Amelia]

Nich,

I'm so sorry. I know how hearbreaking it is to lose a pet. I'm a cat person myself. In fact, my son says I'm the neighborhood cat lady. My husband is just as bad as me, so we have 6 indoor cats and a feral that we had fixed (after she had two litters) that's been living in our shed for 3 1/2 years.

We beat up on ourselves when something happens, but cats are very good at hiding what's wrong. We lost a sweet indoor cat because she had broken ribs and we didn't know it. She stopped eating a few days before she died, but the vet never suspected injury. He ran blood work and it was fine. We just didn't know why she wasn't eating. I picked her up and held her and she never once cried out in pain. It was only after she had trouble breathing that we found out what was wrong and then it was too late. We have no idea how she got hurt. She was an older cat and heavy and we think she might have tried to jump up on something and fell. I still feel badly about it, but I don't know what else we could have done. That's just the way cats are, so try not to blame yourself.

I know you'll never be able to replace your cat. I still vividly remember every cat I've ever had and in 59 years I've had a lot of them. Unfortunately, their life spans are short compared to ours and some like your cat have even shorter lives. It's still early, but keep in mind that there are many, many wonderful cats in shelters, for adoption on weekeds at Petsmart, etc., out there looking for loving homes. We lost three feral kittens to feline leukemia, so I always tell people to make sure any cats that are adopted are tested. You'll know when the time is right and you're ready once again to let a special little someone into your heart again. I can't tell you how many times I've said never again because it hurts so much to lose one, but we always seem to end up taking another one in.

Best wishes...Amelia

[Strange333]

Hello Everyone,

Things are a little bit better today. I imagine each day it will hurt a little less. I just wanted to say that you all amaze me! You are so supportive, understanding and just all around wonderful! Yesterday, I got on here and read your replies, looked at your links and read some funny stories. It did make me feel better, and Kelly your post(Ray is mean) even made me laugh a little.

I still have ten cats and will probably end up with more. For some reason cats in need find their way to me!?!? I guess I was shocked that this would hit me so hard. I am not am outwardly emotional person and am almost never sad or depressed and I can't remember the last I cried before this. I just wish I could give all of you hugs!
:hug :hug :hug :hug :hug :hug :hug :hug :hug :hug :hug


Thank you all once again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nich
p.s. Yes, I do believe in the rainbow road and I believe that is where little Rolo is now.

[JPenny]

I'm coming to the realization that when you experience loss, all the sadness from past losses comes back to the surface and you grieve for ALL your losses rolled up into the current loss. Does that make any sense? So, although you lost "just" a cat, your grief may be much larger, encompassing past bereavements as well. It's cleansing and healthy, as long as you don't park there. I agree with other posters who suggested rescuing a kitten from the local shelter. I have done that many times, and it seems that the rescued kittens end up having the absolute best personalities. It's almost as though they realize how good they have it and are grateful.

Best wishes to you,

Jean

[graciecat14]

Nich,

I just wanted to add my own words and thoughts of sympathy. Having a pet die is so hard. I have grieved more over some pets than I have over (human) family members who have died.

So I am sending you kittty kisses- the kind where they rub their face against you but put their whole body weight behind it so they knock you over.

Peace to Rolo and to you,

Becky

[WillFlyToDisney2]

Nich,

Glad my post made you chuckle. (Ray really isn't mean...)...

I think Jean is right about the grieving for past losses. Hugs to you!!!

Kelley

[beaugest]

Nich, it never stops amazing me how much a part of the family our pets become. It doesn't matter how many you have or for how long. They have their own place in your life.
Try not to concentrate on what you might have missed or what you should have done.I'm sure you did all that you could. Think about what a great life that kitty had thanks to you...

[sengelin]

So sorry to hear about your loss. We lost our oldest cat to cardiomiopathy last year and it was heartbreaking. I found www.petloss.com to be very helpful.

Sean

[Strange333]

Thanks all...and thanks for the Kitty kisses!!! I love those!

Nich