I'm back and not better

[TraderDude]

Hey folks. It's been a while since I've posted anything here. That's because I haven't been on a plane in a long time (maybe since january or february). I just can't get myself to go anywhere. I have to go to NYC in September and I am already dreading that one. Now I am supposed to go to Atlanta in August to visit my wife's sister and newborn niece. I just can't get myself to book that ticket and am talking with my wife about her going alone.

It seems every trip report I have read regarding ATL involves terrible weather, lots of turbulence and generally bad experiences. Maybe only the bad ones get posted, but in the middle of August the chances of summer storms wreaking havoc do seem high.

I also have an anniversary coming up and I wanted to surprise my wife with a vacation to somewhere fun, maybe even Europe. That one never got past the idea stage.

Woe is me. I just can't seem to get on planes anymore. I avoid lots of trips and just seem much happier staying where I am. Not exactly a success story. I hate it, but I don't know how to change it.

[WillFlyToDisney]

Hey TraderDude!

Don't beat yourself up about it. Going a long time between flights gives plenty of time for that pesky old fear of flying to creep back in and take hold.

There is nothing at all wrong with ATL. I believe they handle more air traffic than any other airport in the US - and they do it beautifully! I rarely have delays out of ATL or long waits on the tarmac. The ATC folks there are top notch and there are plenty of runways for takeoffs and landings.

Have you thought about asking your doctor for something like xanax just to "take the edge off"? I used xanax when I started flying again and it just barely edged out the anxiety so I could get on the plane without having a panic attack.

If you don't have Ray's book then order it. GREAT reading.

Most of all, post here and read the other threads, especially the stickys. We are here for you. We have been where you are and totally understand how you feel.

Work on one flight at a time. Focus first on the ATL one without obsessing about all 3 flights (ATL, NYC and possibly Europe) if you can.

Get some new distractions. I am hooked on Sudoku books now and do them during takeoff and landing when I have to have my Ipod turned off.

Kelley

[cshollingsworth]

i haven't flown through ATL but i did drive through downtown just a few days ago on my way home from hilton head. anyway, ATL looks so neat because, unlike other airports, you get to see planes taking off constantly.

i am such a huge coward of flying, but i simply love looking at airplanes in flight. so, as my husband drove us through downtown, i was free to look up and see planes zooming over our head on the highway. there had to be at least 5 or 6 planes in the air at one time (which i could see). there may have been more. but it is really nifty to be driving along, look up and see a plane going in for a landing right over your head! i told my husband that a fun trip would be to go to ATL and spend the night very close to the airport and watch planes. i think it would be very helpful to someone like me with a fear of flying.

anyway, just thought i would let you guys know about my experience passing by near the ATL airport! :D

[StPeteMark]

..... i told my husband that a fun trip would be to go to ATL and spend the night very close to the airport and watch planes. i think it would be very helpful to someone like me with a fear of flying....:DAgreed, this can a VERY good tool!!! In the early stages of getting back into the air, visiting the airport many times was a big help in gaining courage for flying.
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[BAH]

Hey folks. It's been a while since I've posted anything here. That's because I haven't been on a plane in a long time (maybe since january or february). I just can't get myself to go anywhere. I have to go to NYC in September and I am already dreading that one. Now I am supposed to go to Atlanta in August to visit my wife's sister and newborn niece. I just can't get myself to book that ticket and am talking with my wife about her going alone.

It seems every trip report I have read regarding ATL involves terrible weather, lots of turbulence and generally bad experiences. Maybe only the bad ones get posted, but in the middle of August the chances of summer storms wreaking havoc do seem high.

I also have an anniversary coming up and I wanted to surprise my wife with a vacation to somewhere fun, maybe even Europe. That one never got past the idea stage.

Woe is me. I just can't seem to get on planes anymore. I avoid lots of trips and just seem much happier staying where I am. Not exactly a success story. I hate it, but I don't know how to change it.

I thought I would post a reply to this thread because I just took my first flight since 1989 due to a very bad panic attack on a flight to San Diego. All I can say is that I love flying now. I used to as a kid as well and found it fascinating being up there above the clouds.

On July 18th, I flew from Denver to Dallas and was pretty scared, to say the least. I had to take 1.5mg of Alprazolam to get on that plane but once we took off, I was fine.

On July 21st, I only needed 1mg and it was much easier and less nerve wracking. I was still nervous to say the least but it was easier and I needed less of the medicine to do it. I had to wait at Dallas in the airport for over 4 hours before my flight because our class got out early and our shuttle got us to the airport early.

All I can say is, the first few times of flying when you have not flown for a long time, you are probably going to need an anti-anxiety drug to help you. Not everyone will but I think it is always a good idea to have them with you so if you need it, you can take it. I actually had a blast both times because I was sitting by really neat people and we were talking the whole time.

The other thing that really helped me was to have a window seat. I like to be able to see out and see what is going on below me. We had pretty bad turbulence going in to Dallas and it really did not bother too much because of Captain Stark's book.

You have to take that leap and do it to really get over it. I still am not completely over my fear of flying but I can honestly say that I can actually DO IT because I did it. And I have something that can help me if I need it, which I did this time.

Get Captain Stark's book and talk to your doc about getting some Xanax and you should be fine.

Brad

[Rebecca]

Woe is me. I just can't seem to get on planes anymore. I avoid lots of trips and just seem much happier staying where I am. Not exactly a success story. I hate it, but I don't know how to change it.
T-Dude, your words echo the exact sentiments of probably dozens of people on this site, myself included, at various points in their lives. This site exists because of that very mindset, especially the part about hating being grounded by fear.

I'm no therapist, but I have observed that people usually don't change until they get so sick of the status quo that to stay there becomes unacceptable.

I don't like being in the air, and probably always will feel that way. But I fly with my husband (a private pilot) because I want to be with him and share with him something he so obviously enjoys. I am learning about aviation and flight and how the systems work, and all that has helped me with the anticipatory dread and chilly feet.

It's all about seeing the people we love and seeing the world in a different way. Don't give up. You're HERE on Taking Flight ... you didn't darken your screen and turn away. You turned in the direction where help lies, and I think that's a great indicator that you're ready to CHANGE!!!

[TraderDude]

Thanks to all for the words of encouragement. I am going to take that flight to Atlanta just because I'll be PO'd at myself if I don't.

[WillFlyToDisney]

Thanks to all for the words of encouragement. I am going to take that flight to Atlanta just because I'll be PO'd at myself if I don't.

Take your motivation from where you can. :thumbsup: Seriously. I got to the point where I was MAD at myself for being so scared. It was a great turning point in my mental state and made me even more determined to get on a plane and FLY.

[TraderDude]

I booked my flight. About 2hrs each way in an American Airlines MD80, window seat on the 2-seat side. Now I wait!:cool:

[aerobat]

Good going, Dude! Booking the flight is a serious first step. You did it because you know, deep down, that it was a safe decision.

I agree with you and everyone else here who has said that being PO-ed with oneself is a good motivator. But that, too, is just a first step. There is so much more you can do to dismantle your negative expectations and stop that "B-movie" you've got running. Please take some time right now and carefully reread everyone's posts here, and remember that everyone here knows exactly how you feel--because we've all been there.

Look at this flight to Atlanta as an Opportunity--with a big O--to get some real work done on your fear. If you put some effort into this, you will be rewarded--not only with a surprising level of comfort while flying, but with some very satisfying insights into your fear and the path ahead.

Please check out the recommended stickies. Please check out anxieties.com. Please get Ray's book. You're a gunfighter who's learning to shoot accurately with both the left and right hands, and your fear is that villain in the middle of the dusty street. Plug 'im. :)

Please post here often, and tell us exactly what your concerns are. We will help you take aim.

You don't have to muster superhuman courage to get on the plane; you just need a little courage to deal with the anticipatory anxiety. Once you see that you can handle that, you'll know that you can get ready to fly.

And I mean READY. No fig-newtons of the imagination here. :boxer:
Barb

[Earthbound]

Hey, TraderDude!

Great advice has already been given, but I'd just like to add one thought that popped into my mind when I read your post.

It seems every trip report I have read regarding ATL involves terrible weather, lots of turbulence and generally bad experiences. Maybe only the bad ones get posted, but in the middle of August the chances of summer storms wreaking havoc do seem high.

One thing all those trip reports have in common, aside from the bad weather, is that their writers lived to tell the tales! The one phrase that I've heard most often from the experts regarding my fear of turbulence is (chant it with me, everyone): "Turbulence is a comfort issue -- not a safety issue." On my most recent flight (my first in four years), I had that phrase on endless loop in my mind. :cool:

Remember, even when planes get the crap kicked out of them by bad weather, they still land safely. Turbulence sucks, but it's normal, and even if you do end up getting bounced around a little, you'll have great crews in the air and on the ground to get you through it just fine.